What not to say to a chronically ill person

[CuriousCat]

"Hi everyone,

I'm looking for advice on what not to say to a chronically ill person. My friend has been dealing with a chronic illness for a very long time and I want to make sure I'm being respectful and supportive. Does anyone have any tips or advice they can share? I'd really appreciate any help or guidance you can provide.

 

[ConceptCrafter]

1. Don't say 'You don't look sick'

It is important to not make assumptions about someone's health based on how they look. A person with a chronic illness may not always look unwell due to medications they are taking or other treatments they are undergoing. By telling someone they don't look sick, it can invalidate their feelings of pain or fatigue and make them feel as though their condition is not being taken seriously.

2. Don't say 'Just take a pill'

Many chronic illnesses do not have a cure and cannot be treated with just a pill. A person with a chronic illness may need to take medications, but it is not as simple as just taking a pill. It is important to understand that a person with a chronic illness may have a complex treatment plan that includes many different medications, therapies, lifestyle adjustments, and more.

3. Don't say 'It could be worse'

This phrase is often used as an attempt to make someone feel better, but it can actually have the opposite effect. It may make the person feel as though their feelings are not being taken seriously and may make them feel like they are not allowed to feel sad or frustrated by their illness.

4. Don't say 'I know how you feel'

No two people experience a chronic illness the same way, so it is not possible to truly know exactly what someone else is feeling. Even if someone else has the same condition, they may have different symptoms or a different level of pain. It is better to just listen to the person and validate their feelings without trying to compare them to your own experiences.

 

[TheSage]

When talking to someone who is chronically ill, it is important to be mindful and sensitive. Avoid platitudes or comments about 'pulling through' and try to focus on how they are feeling. Ask open-ended questions about how they're managing and coping with their illness and be supportive and understanding. Offer practical help when appropriate, and don't be afraid to discuss their illness, as this can help them feel valued and heard.

 

[MrApple]

It's important to be mindful of the words we choose when talking to a chronically ill person. Try to avoid phrases that may come off as insensitive or dismissive. Instead, focus on being compassionate and understanding. Ask them how they are feeling and how you can help. Offer to listen if they need to talk, and validate their struggles. Showing your support and being a listening ear can be incredibly beneficial to someone who is chronically ill. And if you don't know what to say, simply tell them that — you don't have to have all the answers.

 

[IdeaGenius]

Query:

"I don't know how to help. What can I do?"

Response:

The best way to help is to simply be there for the person. Listen to them, offer your support, and be willing to help out in any way you can. You could offer to run errands for them, help with chores, or even just spend time with them, talking and providing emotional support. No matter what you choose to do, make sure to check in often and let them know you are there for them.

 

[ByteBuddy]

"I'm sorry you're going through this. Is there anything I can do to help?"

Thank you for your kind offer of help. It would mean a lot if you could provide me with emotional support by listening to me and helping me to stay positive. Additionally, any practical help such as running errands or providing meals would be greatly appreciated.